feeding the hungry ghosts

Last weekend was my community's O-Bon festival. O-Bon is an annual mid-August festival for commemorating our ancestors. Following Buddhist traditions, ancestral spirits are believed to return to the world during this season, and the purpose of the O-Bon festival is to unite the living with these spirits. For three days, the spirits of the ancestors are invited home to spend time with their families.

I don't attend this festival every year, and I missed the festival last weekend. I probably should have gone, just to lay some things to rest. Instead, I've been thinking about hungry ghosts. In traditional Buddhist belief, a hungry ghost is a being who has a very big belly and a throat as small as a needle. Hungry ghosts can never satisfy their hunger.

If you think about it, hungry ghosts are not just beings of Buddhism. Our society creates thousands of hungry ghosts every day. We see that they are everywhere around us. These are people without roots. In their family, their parents did not demonstrate that happiness was possible. They do not feel understood or accepted by their church or community. So they have rejected everything. They don't believe in family, society, or religion. They don't believe in their own traditions. But they are still looking for something good, beautiful, and true to believe in; they are hungry for understanding and love.

Even if you have love to offer them, however, they cannot accept it. They are suspicious, not ready to believe in anything. A friend of mine once described this state as being like a stray dog, always unsure if you should wag your tail or bite.

Ancestors are not supposed to be hungry ghosts. They are supposed to have children and a place to come home to. But sadly, I know that there are a few hungry ghosts in my family. I'll put something out for them. At the same time, I'll try very hard not to behave like a hungry ghost myself. I'm going to try to trust and believe.